Tag Archives: marriage

Hobbies and Hubbies

This blog has been building for awhile in this head of mine and I have been hesitant about writing it for two reasons:

1.  I am pretty sure it is going to make me come across as a nagging, negative nelly of a wife.

2.  I never want to throw my husband (P) under a bus (unless it’s that time of the month), and I am quite sure that this blog is going to do that.

This is my thought this morning…screw it.  I need a place to vent!  I mean isn’t that why ALL of my fellow bloggers started writing in the first place?

Anyone that reads this blog on a regular basis knows that P and I are “trying” (aka “struggling”) to get out of debt.  There are months that we take several steps forward, then there are times that we decide to stop trying and take bigger leaps back.  I think I finally figured out what one of our biggest issues is:

Our hobbies.

Don’t get me wrong, I think it is a beautiful thing when someone has hobbies.  Having hobbies means that we are able to focus on various projects and activities that we are passionate about, and passionate people make the world go round.

Enter rant.

I just think there is a HUGE amount of financial discrepancy between P and I’s hobbies.

Let me break it down for you.

OUR MUTUAL HOBBIES

Travel

HawaiiSunsetHoneymoon

Price:  $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$  

Yes, this one is our most expensive ones, but we usually try to fit in one vacation every couple of years (if we can afford it or not).  Our thought process is this:  You only live once.  So when the opportunity to go to Mexico or Hawaii comes along just put it on the credit card and figure it out later.  Not a good mentality.

Hikes/Drives

2405603-Coeur_d__Alene_Trail (1)

Price:  Free!!!

P and I are so fortunate to live in such a beautiful part of the country!   There are some Sundays when we take the Jeep (ugh…the “jeep”…more on that later) and just drive.  We also love taking the dogs and going on some gorgeous hikes!

Eating

giphy (3)

Price:  $$$

P and I are HUGE foodies!  We love food, but who doesn’t?  Going out to eat should be a luxury for us, given our debt situation BUT it happens at least a couple of times a week.  This hobby is probably one of the hobbies we need to work on being less passionate about!

MY HOBBIES

Reading

girl-reading-black-book (1)

Price:  Free!!!

I have loved reading since I was a wee one and I typically don’t spend any money for books.  I either go to the library or buy books with money or gift cards I receive as birthday/Christmas presents.

Writing/Blogging

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Price:  Free!!!

Another free hobby that I LOVE!

Photography

IMAG1019           IMAG1052_1          IMAG1053

Price:  Free!!!

Besides the initial cost of the camera, taking pictures is something that also happens to be fabulous and free.  I mostly enjoy taking nature shots and pics of my cute little animals (Juju, Orville, and Scully).  Yes, I realize taking regular photo shoots of my animals is kind of sad but aren’t they just too adorable for words?!

All things Bravo

Bravo_TV.svg

Price: $

Andy Cohen is the SHIT when it comes to tapping into what a twenty-something…okay I can’t lie to even you guys about my age…a thirty-something wants to watch for brainless entertainment.  Since we don’t have cable, I do have to buy episodes online of my Real Housewives.

P’S HOBBIES

The Jeep (Just Empty Every Pocket)

jeep-wave-1

Price: $$$$$$$$

My hubby loves the other woman in his life. His damn Jeep.  He spends much more time with her than me and has spent thousands on tires and accessories.  Not to mention that this bitch is one gas guzzler.  Another annoying part about owning a Jeep:  You have to WAVE at everyone else who is driving a Jeep when you are in a Jeep.  Some people wave but others ignore you and then your feelings get hurt.

Guns

Shooting+5+targets+in+under+one+second_51c2ef_4502755

Price:  $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Between the price of guns, ammo, time at shooting ranges, and accessories, this is almost on par with the money we spend on traveling.  P wants to get into shooting competitions too.  He sees fun, I see even more dollar signs.

Gaming

southpark-mmo-gamer-ps4-gamer-640x428

Price:  $$$$$$$

I will say, P has been much better about buying video games lately.  He still has a collection of hundreds of games that were anywhere from $30-$60 a pop, but he has gotten better.

Camping

Sharon-Stone-Close-Up-76502

Price:  Normal people ($$), my husband ($$$$$$$$$)

P loves camping and being out in the woods with nature.  This girl needs a toilet and AC.  One day when we get an RV I will happily join him on his excursions out to the woods.  This weekend my husband went out camping sans me to shoot guns, ride ATVs, drink and pee outside.  Man stuff.  Normally camping is a great way to get away for cheap.  Well this lady checked our bank account and found that he spent several hundred dollars on three days of camping.  WTF!!!!  He gets home today, so their will definitely be an interrogation waiting for him (of course this will be after I kiss and love on him and tell him how much I miss him).  He may have to try to “Sharon Stone” his way out of this one.

I’m not saying I’m a savings angel and P is my Tasmanian spending devil (but I am implying it *wink*).  I’m just saying that there is a huge difference financially in what we spend our money on in our free time.  P works hard and I work hard…sort of.  If we weren’t in such a financial hole I would definitely be more apt to loosen the purse strings for myself and let things go more with what he spends his money on.  The truth is that we are in debt and I don’t want to be in debt forever.  I know many people think that it is a part of life to have a car payment, a house payment, student loan debt, and credit card debt, but I don’t want that to be our story.

Anybody out there feel the same?  Is it just me or does your spouse also have more expensive hobbies than you?  How do you deal with it?

Thanks for letting me vent guys!

Ang

Ringing in the new year with new debt

We are only into the new year by two weeks and this house is already into another several thousand dollars worth of debt.

Here is how it happened.

P wanted a plasma TV.  According to P, plasmas were endangered and quickly heading into extinction which meant we had to get one “NOW!  NOW!  NOW!”

I looked deeply into his eyes and told him that we didn’t have the money set aside for a plasma TV, and we already have two TVs so we don’t need a third.  I offered him sex if he agreed with me.

thumbsup

He did.

Then the next morning…

P and I carpooled to work and he brought up the plasma AGAIN.  I thought we put this thing to bed (if you know what I mean, *wink* *wink*).  P and I went back and forth.  Since he has way more energy than me when it comes to fighting, I just said “whatever you want to do”.

7-Pretty-Woman-quotes

What my baby wants my baby gets because my baby now has a new plasma TV in our living room.

With the new TV came a new problem.  Our TV stand we currently had couldn’t hold the weight of our new TV.  So now our new plasma TV is now placed atop a new entertainment center.

Then for shits and giggles we decided to look for sectionals.  After all, we couldn’t enjoy the new TV on the new entertainment center with our current “old” couches.  So now our living room is filled with a brand new sectional to enjoy the new plasma TV placed ever so beautifully on our new entertainment center.tumblr_mbg0bv8sn31qjj0j1o1_500

I guess when all else fails it is at least material for my blog!

Ang

How I feel during video game season!

My husband wishes he was single.  Well, at least “single” during every video game season.

You all have heard of football widows, but I am most definitely a video game widow.  Far Cry 4 is the latest obsession for P.  It’s ironic because while he is playing it I am crying from a distance for attention.

Ang

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Sunday Quotes: Marriage

The last few months have very much been a roller coaster. Some very high highs and some very low lows. The best thing about all of it is that I have a pretty incredible partner to ride this roller coaster we call “life” with. Here is to celebrating  lifelong love!

 

Thanks for reading and see you back here tomorrow for an all new blog in my #93daysofblogging challenge.

Ang

Why Women Nag

nagP and I have been married for nearly 6 years now and I have a confession to make.  I am a nagging wife.  Much like the blonde bitch in this picture, I am in his ear nagging him about eating healthier and picking up after himself.  I HATE being a nag, and if your wife  nags you I guarantee she hates it too.

To help explain why women nag, let me start with my story.  The transition from P’s girlfriend to fiancee to ex-girlfriend/ex-fiancee to girlfriend again to fiancee to ex-girlfriend/ex-fiancee to girlfriend to fiancee  to FINALLY wife was a hard one (yes, your basic math skills are up to snuff, it took us three engagements and a whole lot of booze to get us to walk down the aisle).

It was so much more fun being the girlfriend/fiancee and even ex-girlfriend/ex-fiancee because I was a non-nag.   It was a beautiful thing, but then I became the wife version of me.  The “wife” me now has to take off my rose colored glasses and realize that this is my partner for the next 50 years. Time to divvy up the chores and consult him on household decisions. This is the person I am waking up to every day for the rest of my life. The future father of my children. The man who I will share a toilet with as well as insurance policies, car payments and a mortgage. This is the man who will drive me to drink and drive me home when I have a little too much to drink.

A lot changes once you become a wife.  The most infuriating change is nagging.

No woman aspires to be the nagging wife, it just happens.

There are two types of nagging:  Love nagging and frustration nagging.

Let’s start with the easy one:  Love Nagging.

Yes we get on you about what you eat and taking better care of yourself.  Spoiler alert:  We love you and want you to live a very long life with us.  gty_senior_couple_ll_110623_wgWe didn’t get married just to end up widowed.  Trust us, we don’t want to be on the single scene again.  Do you know what that means for us?  Shaving our body hair on a regular basis again!!  Ughhh.  We nag because we want you to live a long life so we don’t have to subject ourselves to dating again…oh, and we love you!

Now the nasty one: Frustration Nagging.

To illustrate frustration nagging, let’s use the scenario of a simple household chore: emptying out the dishwasher.

We ask you to empty out the dishwasher.  We don’t tell you to, we ask politely in a very sweet and loving voice.  You say you will.

We ask: “When?”

Your response as you are playing video games:  “Ummm, I don’t know, when I feel like it.”

We ask  in a slightly less sweet and loving voice: “Can you do it tonight?”

Your response:  “Yeah, sure (following language is inaudible, but obviously cursing at a 12 year old you are online gaming with)”.

Wife goes to bed expecting to wake up to a dishwasher that has been emptied.

Fast forward to the next morning and the wife wakes to a full dishwasher.  article-1262179-005839A700000258-962_468x286Now we (“we” meaning all of us collective nagging wives out there) get pissed and the  “frustration nag” is born.  When you say you are going to empty out the dishwasher, and it doesn’t get done we get upset. Not necessarily because it didn’t get done, but because you said it was going to get done and it didn’t. So technically, you lied. It was a very harmless little white lie (except for raising our blood pressure), but a lie nonetheless. Not only that, but now instead of wasting more of our sweet and loving voices to ask you once again to empty out the dishwasher we decide to just do it ourselves which makes us more tired and more naggy.

So now, next time we ask you to do something, we have the dishwasher scenario in the back of our minds. You disappointed us once, so this time we will make sure that you don’t disappoint us again. Asking you once to empty out the dishwasher obviously didn’t work, but maybe asking you again and again and again to empty out the dishwasher until it gets done will ensure that it gets done. Right?  You call it nagging, we call it exhausting.

So next time your wife asks you to do something and starts “frustration nagging”, here are your two options:

The first, do it. Your wife will be happy and more apt to let you do “girlfriend” things to her in the bedroom.

The second, don’t. Be honest and just say you are too lazy to get off your butt, turn off your video game, and too busy cursing at 12 year olds from Iowa to help out around the house (but make sure you compliment your wife in the process).  Say something like “That isn’t going to happen, but you have one hell of an ass.” You won’t get laid, but she will be so pissed off at you she probably won’t talk to you, let alone ask you to do anything for the next week or so (P, you are exempt from this option.  I have a black belt in nagging and I know how to use it, but I agree with you that I do have a great ass).

Thanks for reading and join me tomorrow for a nag-free blog in my #93daysofblogging this summer!

Ang (which if you move the letters around is “nag”…hmmmm)