Tag Archives: money issues

Hobbies and Hubbies

This blog has been building for awhile in this head of mine and I have been hesitant about writing it for two reasons:

1.  I am pretty sure it is going to make me come across as a nagging, negative nelly of a wife.

2.  I never want to throw my husband (P) under a bus (unless it’s that time of the month), and I am quite sure that this blog is going to do that.

This is my thought this morning…screw it.  I need a place to vent!  I mean isn’t that why ALL of my fellow bloggers started writing in the first place?

Anyone that reads this blog on a regular basis knows that P and I are “trying” (aka “struggling”) to get out of debt.  There are months that we take several steps forward, then there are times that we decide to stop trying and take bigger leaps back.  I think I finally figured out what one of our biggest issues is:

Our hobbies.

Don’t get me wrong, I think it is a beautiful thing when someone has hobbies.  Having hobbies means that we are able to focus on various projects and activities that we are passionate about, and passionate people make the world go round.

Enter rant.

I just think there is a HUGE amount of financial discrepancy between P and I’s hobbies.

Let me break it down for you.

OUR MUTUAL HOBBIES

Travel

HawaiiSunsetHoneymoon

Price:  $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$  

Yes, this one is our most expensive ones, but we usually try to fit in one vacation every couple of years (if we can afford it or not).  Our thought process is this:  You only live once.  So when the opportunity to go to Mexico or Hawaii comes along just put it on the credit card and figure it out later.  Not a good mentality.

Hikes/Drives

2405603-Coeur_d__Alene_Trail (1)

Price:  Free!!!

P and I are so fortunate to live in such a beautiful part of the country!   There are some Sundays when we take the Jeep (ugh…the “jeep”…more on that later) and just drive.  We also love taking the dogs and going on some gorgeous hikes!

Eating

giphy (3)

Price:  $$$

P and I are HUGE foodies!  We love food, but who doesn’t?  Going out to eat should be a luxury for us, given our debt situation BUT it happens at least a couple of times a week.  This hobby is probably one of the hobbies we need to work on being less passionate about!

MY HOBBIES

Reading

girl-reading-black-book (1)

Price:  Free!!!

I have loved reading since I was a wee one and I typically don’t spend any money for books.  I either go to the library or buy books with money or gift cards I receive as birthday/Christmas presents.

Writing/Blogging

tumblr_mstt6wIZv71rl48exo1_500

Price:  Free!!!

Another free hobby that I LOVE!

Photography

IMAG1019           IMAG1052_1          IMAG1053

Price:  Free!!!

Besides the initial cost of the camera, taking pictures is something that also happens to be fabulous and free.  I mostly enjoy taking nature shots and pics of my cute little animals (Juju, Orville, and Scully).  Yes, I realize taking regular photo shoots of my animals is kind of sad but aren’t they just too adorable for words?!

All things Bravo

Bravo_TV.svg

Price: $

Andy Cohen is the SHIT when it comes to tapping into what a twenty-something…okay I can’t lie to even you guys about my age…a thirty-something wants to watch for brainless entertainment.  Since we don’t have cable, I do have to buy episodes online of my Real Housewives.

P’S HOBBIES

The Jeep (Just Empty Every Pocket)

jeep-wave-1

Price: $$$$$$$$

My hubby loves the other woman in his life. His damn Jeep.  He spends much more time with her than me and has spent thousands on tires and accessories.  Not to mention that this bitch is one gas guzzler.  Another annoying part about owning a Jeep:  You have to WAVE at everyone else who is driving a Jeep when you are in a Jeep.  Some people wave but others ignore you and then your feelings get hurt.

Guns

Shooting+5+targets+in+under+one+second_51c2ef_4502755

Price:  $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Between the price of guns, ammo, time at shooting ranges, and accessories, this is almost on par with the money we spend on traveling.  P wants to get into shooting competitions too.  He sees fun, I see even more dollar signs.

Gaming

southpark-mmo-gamer-ps4-gamer-640x428

Price:  $$$$$$$

I will say, P has been much better about buying video games lately.  He still has a collection of hundreds of games that were anywhere from $30-$60 a pop, but he has gotten better.

Camping

Sharon-Stone-Close-Up-76502

Price:  Normal people ($$), my husband ($$$$$$$$$)

P loves camping and being out in the woods with nature.  This girl needs a toilet and AC.  One day when we get an RV I will happily join him on his excursions out to the woods.  This weekend my husband went out camping sans me to shoot guns, ride ATVs, drink and pee outside.  Man stuff.  Normally camping is a great way to get away for cheap.  Well this lady checked our bank account and found that he spent several hundred dollars on three days of camping.  WTF!!!!  He gets home today, so their will definitely be an interrogation waiting for him (of course this will be after I kiss and love on him and tell him how much I miss him).  He may have to try to “Sharon Stone” his way out of this one.

I’m not saying I’m a savings angel and P is my Tasmanian spending devil (but I am implying it *wink*).  I’m just saying that there is a huge difference financially in what we spend our money on in our free time.  P works hard and I work hard…sort of.  If we weren’t in such a financial hole I would definitely be more apt to loosen the purse strings for myself and let things go more with what he spends his money on.  The truth is that we are in debt and I don’t want to be in debt forever.  I know many people think that it is a part of life to have a car payment, a house payment, student loan debt, and credit card debt, but I don’t want that to be our story.

Anybody out there feel the same?  Is it just me or does your spouse also have more expensive hobbies than you?  How do you deal with it?

Thanks for letting me vent guys!

Ang

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Old Habits Die Hard

It was one very fun yet very expensive weekend. Old Ang and P went out  on the town and spent money stupidly.  help-me-im-poorThe new and improved versions of Ang and P are now  paying for it.  Here is a glimpse at our mindset this weekend:

Plenty of food at home? Nah, let’s dine out FOUR times!!

$6.00 beers at the baseball game? Sounds like a completely reasonable price.  We will have 4 each please.

Sold out of the normal showing of Guardians of the Galaxy? Well, we will just go to the next 3-D showing and spend $28.00 for two people to see a movie (the movie was awesome by the way).

Needless to say, this gal has an upset stomach and a throbbing headache after looking at her bank account balance this morning.

Hope all of you had a more frugal weekend than we did!

Ang

Love and Money

When you get the good fortune to find someone in this life that you can tolerate for the next4fdaa3b92775483bba6715652ec615ee 60 years, the next step is usually the combining of households. Nothing says “I love you” more than the willingness to live in the same space and share the same toilet. Only love could bring us to the point where we would want to share the most intimate of spaces. However, more intimate than the sharing of time on the porcelain throne is the sharing of money.

Now there are some couples I know that keep their finances separate. Their money is their money and all combined bills are split in half. If it works for you then that is fantastic. However, this is not the case with P and myself. From the second we got engaged for the third and final time (sometimes a girl needs to be proposed to several times in order to make sure her gentleman caller is serious) we knew that there would be a melding of what little money we had at the time. That is the nice thing about being poor, no prenup is necessary because nobody wants half of nothing.

The agreement we had before we walked down the aisle was that I would be in charge of paying the bills and the finances. The reason for this was simple: P was the dreamer and I was the realist. I am finding out that when it comes to money you have to be real.

couple-fighting-over-moneyThis worked the first few years of our marriage. I paid the bills, we budgeted out what we could afford and had very little debt besides our *shiver* student loan debt (I’m not going to rage…errr…I mean write about that topic in fear of developing carpal tunnel syndrome).

Then resentment built up on both sides. P felt like he was constantly on a budget and being told “no” when he wanted to buy something. I felt like I was constantly saying “no” and was tired of being the responsible one.

P’s dreamer mentality was appealing to me. So much so that I let go of the financial reins, closed my eyes and became a dreamer too. It was pure bliss, until I woke up after a couple of years to find us in over $12,000 of credit card debt. A very rude awakening indeed.

That is when I realized that there is only room for one dreamer in this marriage and it is not me. I have always been the girl with her feet firmly planted on the ground. A realist when it comes to life, love and finally with money again. My realistic mentality is getting us out of debt that my dreamer mentality got us into (but it sure was fun to be a dreamer while it lasted).

If you combine your finances and you want to be financially secure there has to be one person who is a realist.  There has to be someone who is talking sense (or cents, *wink* *wink*) when it comes to money.

So let me end this post by making a confession.  My name is Angela and I am a realist.  There, I said it.  I am no little suzy homemaker, I am a healthy proportionately sized suzy sensemaker.  And I am okay with that.

Thanks for reading, and leave a comment below.  Would love to know how many of my readers are dreamers or realists when it comes to money.

Ang